Stories of Drunken States from Unlucky Taxi Drivers: Part 2

Here’s the 2nd installment of taxi driver stories.

Red lipstick

“This group of girls were really drunk and one of them started touching up her make up, but as the car was dark, she accidentally smeared red lipstick all over her face instead of foundation. I didn’t realise until I pulled up to drop them off and all her friends started laughing at her. She was so upset that I ended up driving her straight back home.”

Plastic plant

“A customer I had stole one of those big plastic plants from outside Nando’s after a night out and tried to stuff it into the car with her and her mates. It wouldn’t fit so I had to charge them to cancel their ride and leave them to order another taxi.”

Hungover travels

“I was taking one guy to the station, or so I thought…turns out he was hungover and had slept through his alarm, so I had to drive him to the airport instead. £90, and a lot of stress later, I bet he wished he’d called it a night sooner.”

Car confusion

“I once waited ages outside this house to pick up a customer. When she eventually came outside she was so drunk that she couldn’t work out which car to get in and started running up and down the road trying all the doors of the parked cars. I ended up having to get out and wave at her whilst her friends watched and laughed.”

BBQ sauce

“I was taxiing a group of girls home after their night out and they all had McDonald’s. I said they were find to eat it in the car as long as they were careful and they agreed. When we were about 5 minutes away from their destination the car started to smell really strongly of BBQ sauce. One of the girls had fallen asleep with her food in her hands and there was BBQ sauce all over her coat, in her hair and all over the back seats of my car.”

Halloween havoc

“I picked up 3 passengers on Halloween – they were sat awkwardly in the backseat, huddled together, and there was a strange smell coming off them. It wasn’t until they got out of my car that I realised they’d spilled a bag of fake blood all over themselves, and the back seat smelt like something had crawled back there to die.”

Made a fool of yourself in a taxi more than once? Maybe it’s time to cut down the booze.

Will you make sure you escape with your dignity intact next time you get a taxi home after drinking?

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