Everyone has that friend you pretend not to know on a night out. If you can’t think who it is, it’s probably you. Here are the cringeworthy stages to look out for…
1. They get far too rowdy at predrinks
No matter where you are or who you’re with, they’re known for being the loudest one in the room – for all the wrong reasons. Whether that’s telling your mate’s girlfriend to eff off or spilling Jägermeister all over the carpet, they’re always causing a scene.
2. They get naked at every opportunity
They’ll use any excuse to strip off and parade the room, resulting in you seeing far more of your friend than you ever wanted to. Ew.
3. They say something they really shouldn’t
They have one (or five) too many and slur something utterly embarrassing to someone they shouldn’t. You’ll never be able to look them in the eye again.
4. They cry at the slightest inconvenience
The DJ won’t play their favourite song? Cry. No text back? Cry. The takeaway has run out of gravy? Cry again. They receive some questionable looks that make you want to crawl into a corner and die of embarrassment for them.
5. They act like they’re Beyoncé
Drunk in Love or just plain smashed? They embarrass you until the End of Time with their less than Flawless dance moves.
6. They always make an early exit because they’re too drunk
Whether it’s passing out at pres or falling asleep in a club toilet, they’re always forced to leave the party early because they’ve gone too far. They end up missing out on all the fun, but the next day swear “it’ll never happen again”.
7. They vom everywhere
Whether they dive out of the Uber just in time, or fork out 50 quid to clean the seats, the night always ends with their dinner making a reappearance. Pavement pizza anyone? Vile.